We all know the cliché, that young people think they are indestructible. When you are young, you don’t yet have any experience with, any understanding of death, so you are likely to act as though it will never happen to you.

My understanding of it is a little more nuanced. While it is probably true that young people do not fully grasp the possibility that they will die, they also can’t imagine being old.

Because we do not have to experience to understand, we simply exist with two concurrent and opposing feelings; that death is so foreign that it feels impossible yet living to be an old person is so far out that it also feels unlikely.

Humans are complicated creatures; our minds manage to juggle seemingly opposing views like this all the time. Yet we all struggle to grasp things that we have not experienced ourselves, and we frequently misunderstand each other.

The algorithms that run so much of our lives have a hard time understanding us, just as we have a hard time understanding each other. They operate with the biases of their creators. They tend towards simple answers when situations demand intricacy. They have a hard time with unexpected, or new information. The struggles of our machines parallel our own, and that feels like an interesting point of entry for some exploration about the destruction our misunderstandings cause.   

The reference image for this painting is, exactly what the title implies. A glitch caused by the word no.

When presented with an unexpected piece of information, the algorithms that create the images you see when watching a video do their best to determine what it means, and what should happen next. In this case, I cut audio of the model speaking the word “no”, as if it was another piece of video. The video player has no experience with this type of information, and the misunderstanding results in this moment of violent chaos.

This is my third or fourth attempt at this composition, and it feels like it is finally working. The secret to making it work for me (which is completely obvious in retrospect), was to spend less energy manipulating the image as I painted, to create a source image that worked, and then just paint it as it is.

Now that it seems to be working, I am looking forward to exploring some other ideas that this approach feels right for. Moments where we struggle to understand each other. Moments where we are pulled in two directions at once. Moments where a small decision creates drastic and unexpected changes. Moments our mind weaves together concurrent opposing ideas.

In the long tradition of painters struggling to find paintings place in a world where photography exists and can make a better image faster, I currently hold two somewhat opposing views:

Photography is currently the most important and influential medium of expression. It defines our aesthetic language, and while some might argue the dominance of video, in most cases our internet driven world seems to be bending video more towards photography every day.

In a world where over a billion photographs are published daily, the simple fact that a human has to labor over a painting for days (or months), commands attention in a way that photography cannot. Creating great photographs is, of course, difficult and time-consuming work. Unfortunately, all that work is hidden in the final image (and likely going un-noticed by most viewers). In a painting, you can see the human touch. Someone thought this image was worth devoting a piece of their life to creating, and that has a unique power to pull us in.

Despite the fact that photography exists, can create a more realistic image faster, and defines the experience of aesthetic expression for most people; tradition dictates that, if we want to create a figurative work, we should be painting from life. Of course, the reality is that most figurative painters are working from photographic references the majority of the time (the rest are die hard traditionalists, working from photo references only some of the time). Because of this tradition, painters treat reference photographs like a dirty secret, shamefully hidden from view in hopes that they will never see the light of day. This makes some sense, if you are trying to paint like Rembrandt. Except, of course, that Rembrandt already painted like Rembrandt, better than you ever could, 400 some years ago, and photography has been invented in the meantime.

So photography exists, models are expensive, landscapes are ever changing and standing outside in the rain isn’t all that fun; we are all using photography as a tool to create paintings. Let’s stop pretending otherwise and embrace all that photography has to offer. Lens distortion is one of photography’s simplest and most powerful tools, yet painters will go to great lengths to eliminate any evidence of it from their work (or risk the embarrassment of admitting the photographic root of their paintings). Why leave such a powerful tool unused for the sake of tradition?

Photography is currently the most important and influential medium of expression. It defines our aesthetic language, and painters should be using that language to make more interesting and relevant work.

With all that in mind, my latest attempt to pair the strengths of photography, with romance of painting. Similar to the Private Message series, this was a bit of a collaborative effort with the model, involving reference photos from multiple sources (eight photographs, two glitched video clips, and a handful of screenshots). In other words, a painting that couldn’t be made without embracing photography.

This series is still evolving and there will be more to come, so feedback is welcome. I have no idea when or where I will be able to show these paintings, but like the Private Message paintings, they feel like the thing I need to make right now, and I have confidence they will eventually find their audience.

The sight of dandelions springing up around my neighborhood, bright yellow against carpets of green grass, evokes such a comforting feeling of nostalgia.  A perfectly manicured lawn advises you to keep off. One erupting with dandelions offers a warm welcome.

Dandelions are not too different, and no less charming, than a sunflower or chrysanthemum yet, instead of celebrating their beauty, we set out to eradicate them. Compulsions fueling a multi billion dollar industry. Take a look inside any hardware store and you will find isles of products dedicated to eliminating them. But really, dandelions are lovely little flowers.

The ideal lawn is sterile, kept short and immature. It should only allowed to spread in a disciplined manner, by careful introduction of the right seed. This ensures that the lawn stays pure. Free from invasive weeds, Creeping Charlie, Clover, Crabgrass, and Dandelions. Once these intruders appear, reproducing wildly, they can be hard to control. It only takes one weed to ruin a good lawn.

A good lawn says a lot about its owner. Like the right shoes with a nice suit, a thick green lawn compliments your home. Taking the time, or spending the money, to give your lawn the care it needs demonstrates your virtue to the entire neighborhood.  

Not entirely sure I am loving this painting yet and, not exactly sure where I am going to take these paintings but, more to come.

I have been working hard in the studio, trying to put finishing touches on all a bunch of new paintings. That means it’s time to find models for the next round of paintings. I am experimenting with a lot of different ideas and expanding on a few of the older series of paintings, so there is probably something that would work for anyone who is interested and willing to come model for a piece.

Modeling for a painting is generally fairly easy, if you don’t have the time of inclination to sit for extended periods of time, most of the work can be done from reference photos. As a bonus, I will thank you for your time by giving you a small study painting of the piece that you modeled for, or a copy from the next run of screen prints.

With all that in mind, here is what I am working on. If anything catches your interest, get in touch.

Portraits:
This is probably the easiest, and most open ended, type of painting to model for. I have been trying to polish my skills with some more traditional looking portraits, but have some more experimental ideas for those that may be more interested in that.

Sunbathers:
I have always wanted to do more with this series of paintings, and now is the time. I am not sure anyone really gives these paintings much thought beyond being pretty pictures, but I am pretty interested in putting together a bunch of these for a show, and am working on a proper statement that will hopefully elevate them a bit. If you are interested and want to to know more, just ask.

Couples/Relationship studies:
Real couple who want to sit for a portrait together, or just people who are willing to act out relationship struggles.

Finally, the biggest ask:
I am looking for two people act out an argument for the next glitchy painting series. The idea is that this would be an extended series of paintings documenting a relationship coming together and falling apart. The image quality mirrors the mood, starting with some paintings that are quite realistic but, becoming more glitchy and distorted as the scene gets more intense. In my mind, this scene plays out in 10 or 20 individual panels/paintings, which means a lot of reference material will have to be shot.

It’s no secret that I am excited about my solo show, opening February 9th, at Thomas Young Gallery.

I have been spending too much time in the studio working on these paintings over the last year, trying to put together the best show that I can. So honestly, I am looking forward to seeing them all hanging together outside the studio, and getting some real feedback on the project. Beyond that, I’ve got a relatively new baby at home, and I just haven’t been getting out as much as I used too.

With all that in mind, I want to get as many people out to the opening as I possibly can. So, I decided to give away a print to help promote the show.

Before a go any further, a little about the print.

It isn’t a giclee print, or a reproduction of one of the paintings. I don’t do those; I only want to put out hand pulled prints. So, what I came up with is a screen print that echoes the series of paintings in the show. It is a 4 color CMYK print that uses one of the source images from the show. Its glitchy, its imperfect, it has a lo-fi look that I am really into, but it doesn’t look anything like the paintings. I made an edition of 50 and each is signed and numbered. Each one is a real, handmade piece or art.

So, how do you get one.

As promised, they are not for sale. If you want one, all you have to do is help me spread the word about the show.

Like I said, I just want to put on the best show possible, and I want to get as many people to see it as I can. I am going to give one of these prints to anyone that helps me promote the show. If you want one, post a link to the show or the FB event to your Facebook wall. Post one of the paintings to your Instagram. Tweet my blog post about the opening. Wherever you are sharing stuff, put up a little something about the show, tag me or email me so I can see it, and I will send you a print.

Here is the post, with information about the show, to share: https://nickwardonline.com/private-message-at-thomas-young-gallery/

For those of you that aren’t into glitchy screen prints, don’t let that stop you from sharing the show anyway. Also on the off chance more than 50 people take me up on this, I will come up with a second print to send out, but after the second edition of 50, I will have to cap it cause I can’t spend my whole life making free prints. I doubt this will be an issue, but if you want one, share early just in case!

This is a two part post, for information on the show that this piece is headed to, click here.

As I am finishing up the third piece in this series, I’m settling into a good rhythm. The paintings are starting to happen pretty easily, and (I think) they are looking really good. The latest piece is being send out to a great show, and I even have something scheduled that will allow me to hang a larger group of them together (more on that soon). There is really just one problem. I have not figured out a graceful way to explain exactly what it is I have been working on. And that really is a big problem.

People are always curious about artists, and what exactly it is that they do all day. So once you admit to being an artist, you tend to get a lot of questions. They generally start out tentatively, there are a lot of wingnuts out there claiming to be artists, after all. They will ask what your real job is, or maybe they will wonder who exactly would buy an art in this day and age. But once they have felt out the situation a bit, they will almost certainly ask; what kind of art do you make?

When I am faced with this question, I generally respond by glancing towards the ground, and mumbling something about portraits. If it is not already obvious to everyone reading this, that is the wrong answer.

I am not sure how aware the models are of this, but each one of these paintings really is a collaborative effort. The women that are helping with these paintings are setting off without any real direction from me. They have their own ideas about what this kind of sexy image looks like. They are not necessarily professional models, they are not people who are used to making a public display of their private moments; and they have to decide what their line is. Where does a bit of naughty fun, turn into a regret? Where does helping create this painting turn into an uncomfortable public display? I am not there to help make these decisions; and let’s be honest, if I was I would probably just push for more.

And really, this is what makes these painting work. Sure, they are just playing a role. Sure, they are only doing this because I wanted to make some paintings. But really, while the situation is obviously arranged for the sake of art, the decisions being made are real. Not only are the decisions real, but I am hanging their portrait right there, I’m asking them to own the decision.

As the father of a baby girl, I am involved a lot of new baby parenting small talk. Inevitably, this involves fielding a lot of questions about her future dating habits, and how I will scare off her future boyfriends (spoiler alert, I am not sure it is possible for me to be any less worried, and I doubt I will be scaring anyone). Now, I am not mentioning this because I find it particularly egregious. But it has given me a renewed awareness that I really am asking a lot from my models. I am only asking them to play a part in a painted story, but we live in a world where that can lead to some real world judgement and consequences.

When it comes to the power of any individual piece of art, I am not really a true believer. Art can affect people, it can be beautiful and powerful, but no piece of art is going to change the world. So I am not going to try to convince anyone that sitting down and writing this, or making these paintings is going to make the world a better (or worse) place. But I do believe that when you see something is wrong, you should stand up and speak. So really, if I am asking people to put themselves out there for my paintings, I damn well better be prepared to stand up and own my part in the whole process. I better be ready to tell the story, to defend the pieces. At the very least, I better be ready to explain the basics of the project.

So, as I am preparing to send the latest piece in this series off to Miami for an exhibition, I am preparing to discuss the painting in a more meaningful way. In order to do that, I have been trying to come up with an answer to one important question.

How would you feel, what would you do, if it was your daughter sending these sort of images, or participating in this kind of project?

And for a long time, I did not have a good answer for that. But I have realized that I don’t need an answer for that question. There is no question in my mind, that one day she will grow up and do things that (as her parent) I am going to be worried about. She is going to grow up, go on dates, get drunk, have sex, do all things that most grown up people do. So the question for me, is not how would I feel if she grows up to be the kind of girl that sends naughty text messages. The question should be; when she is going through the normal course of growing up and dating, if something goes wrong, do I really want her to feel ashamed? And for me, the answer to that question is obvious.

So I am preparing myself to face these questions head on, and to do my small part in pushing things in the right direction.

See the latest painting from this series in December at Sirona Fine Art in Florida, more info in this post. For those of you that are with me here in Boston, I have a local show in the works featuring these paintings, so keep your eyes open for that.

While I have been fortunate enough to hang my paintings in a lot of great shows, until recently, I have not had the opportunity to hang a show that represents one focused concept. I have hung groups of my paintings together, but I have not started off with the seed of an idea, and finished with a fully realized exhibition.

Now that I have the chance to bring together a show of the Private Message paintings, I am trying to really make the most of the occasion. I want to make it the most interesting show that I can, so I am trying to scrutinize the project as much as I can. Honestly, it really goes without saying that I think the project is compelling, but that is only one side of the story. Since these are fairly collaborative works, whenever I know a model well enough or think she might be interested, I have offered a space here to share her perspective.

As this point, I am going to shut up and turn over the stage to Liz.

I don’t consider myself to be an impulsive person, but if you look at my track record, my history implies it anyway. I’m in no way a planner, and I tend not to weigh consequences too heavily if they’re not particularly interesting to me. That said, I have a pretty good handle on trusting myself and my decisions, so it’s not surprising that I’ve on multiple occasions, offered up my semi-naked services to my college friend, Nick Ward. My own vanity is probably another factor: what woman would not enjoy being the subject of one’s art? If baring it all was part of the deal, so be it. Immodesty posed something of a challenge to me I was certain I could bear. So I did.

To give a little context, I teeter on the line between believing strip clubs are empowering for woman and demoralizing to women. Realistically, they’re not all one or the other. There are certain shades of what these extremes mean, and of course, not all women are the same. When it comes to our sexuality, there is no one to define it for us but ourselves. An inherently terrifying and liberating task all at the same time. Again, shades of gray. 

My own decision to photograph myself naked (and also to be photographed naked) resides in both my comfort with my body and my motivation to push myself toward exposure that encourages an opportunity for growth. While I am confident in my appearance, I have insecurities that keep me from vulnerability just as much as the next guy or gal. To an extent, striking balance between what I am comfortable doing and what scares me just enough, feels ideal. So I am thankful for the challenge and excuse to participate fully in what I consider to be a mutually beneficial opportunity for growth.

The nude figure is such a dominant subject in the arts. It’s hard to forget that humans, in general, are sex obsessed perverts. But hopefully we can set that aside for a minute and start this post off with a little look into one of the subtler aspects of this imagery. Clothes offer such obvious and immediate signals about the time, the place, the status, even the mood of the people wearing them. That is pretty common knowledge, and it can be difficult to look at the image of a clothed person without quickly forming some judgement about what their clothes say (or what they may be trying to say with their clothes). If we strip away the clothes, the viewer is forced to look elsewhere in a piece to find meaning. Also, humans, in general, are sex obsessed perverts that like to sneak a peek at the naughty bits.

This has always been one of my favorite parts of painting nudes (and similarly portraits). Since the context that is normally established by the subject’s clothes is missing from these images, I can start to explore more indirect ways of framing the stories told by my paintings.

Like a lot of people, I have a romantic nostalgia for the aesthetics of older technology. From the soft warm look of old film photos, to the ubiquitous sound of a guitar through a tube amp pushed to its limit, it’s hard to dismiss the beauty imposed by the analog processes of the past. That said, I am not foolish enough to overlook the signatures left by more current technologies. The noise in an image of an older digital camera, or that overly saturated, overly sharp look that people seem to love, or love to hate. The day will come when we look back fondly on the aesthetics of this era, and in the meantime, playing with these aesthetics feels like a great way to more quietly give a place and time to a composition.

So, I have always tried to find ways to make my paintings mimic, or mock, the marks left by todays tools. Over sharp, over saturated video, and photos are one of the unique looks of today. It grabs attention, it looks incredible at first glance; and I would bet that a lot of the same photographers that romanticize the cheap film of the past, probably view this aesthetic as in poor taste (at best). Honestly, those contrasting feelings are exactly why I have always thought this was a good place to play. So I looked for ways to bring some of that look into my paintings. If you look at some of my older paintings, the skin tones are vivid. They are mixed to feel real, but brighter, without using any earth tones. The look is three dimensional, but flat at the same time. I used multiple reference images with different focal points. So nothing is ever really out of focus, nothing falls back, everything is painted sharply.

Now that I have found some more effective ways to bring these ideas into my paintings, I am ready to admit that a lot of my previous attempts flat out failed. I just don’t think anyone really saw what I was trying to do, I don’t think the paintings were really communicating this connection effectively.

As I have been approaching the glitch paintings, finding ways to use the marks left by the different tools used to create the source images has been one of the biggest challenges. One painting is created from high resolution photos and live observation, and one is created from a glitchy, compressed text message image taken from a cell phone; the amount of information available in these two sources is worlds apart. So decisions must be made. Details have to be invented for the low resolution file, and obliterated in the other. Somehow a link has to be formed between these two, very different tools, so that the resulting diptych works together as a single composition.

And now I am trying to make similar connections, except using glitchy video files as a reference.

We have all seen the marks of highly compressed digital video files. The blocky fragmentation of images, the stuttering of quick movements, shapes exploding and merging when frames are dropped. Videos collect scars and the ghosts of past lives remain visible as files are repeatedly sent and saved. The degradation is not as graceful as old film, but the artifacts that develop as digital files reach the end of their useful lives can still be beautiful.

For a long time, I have been thinking about a series of paintings that would explore a single moment, and all the possibilities for the next moment. A series of images that would depict the hugely different effects and subtly different reactions possible at any moment in time between two people. The idea has tantalized me for a while, but I couldn’t find a way to make it visually interesting, until I stumbled on to this idea of slowly degrading image files. Now I have something that helps anchor the idea in time, and allows for very similar images, of very similar situations, to slowly degrade into nothingness.

For now, I only have the first frame to show you. A painting in progress that will become the center panel for this triptych. The best case scenario in this imagined situation.

And a little peak into one of the possible moments to follow.

I am planning a full post about the latest painting soon. In the mean time, I talked to Poets/Artists Mag a little about this series of glitchy paintings. I know I have talked a bit about these pieces already, but if you find yourself wondering – “WTF is he thinking with these paintings?” – this is the best place to start. Follow the link below to check it out…

EDIT: It looks like the link no longer works, so I will re-post the text below.

Please explain the process for this work. Tell us about the series in general.

This series focuses on the disconnect between our digital, and real world lives. Since more and more of our time is spent interacting online, and photographs are no longer constrained to one (or at most, a few) copies, our images are increasingly subject to misuse by anonymous strangers. This is especially true for attractive young women, who often find their most private digital moments taking on a life of their own.

For these paintings, I asked volunteers to send me a text message, or email, with an image that they would normally intend only for a significant other to see. I take this image and crop it so that their face is hidden; so their identity is somewhat lost, and sexual nature of the photograph takes center stage. Next the image file is corrupted using a script that randomly changes bits of the code. For me, the resulting image glitch signifies the end of the useful life for this image. The point where if the image had been shared, the image would no longer be beautiful enough to be forwarded along again. This version of the image is used as reference for the first panel of the painting.

Once I have started working on this panel, the model is asked to visit the studio to sit for a more traditional portrait, exposing her face so that she can reclaim ownership of the image of her body.

Working on this series has been an interesting challenge. Because, the first image is taken by the model herself, I have no real control of the starting point of each diptych. Because the image is sent to me in a text message, it is generally fairly low resolution. Finding ways to integrate the two images into a more composed piece has been problematic. Information has to be added to the low resolution text message image and edited out of the formal portrait, so that the two paintings can meet in the middle with similar levels of detail. At this point, I am starting to figure it all out, so I’m starting to be pretty happy with the resulting pieces.

Where do you see it going?

At this point, I am just happy that most people seem to understand what they are looking at without some big artist statement. I’m planning to make at least 5 or 10 of these pieces before I give up the series so hopefully, once I have a few more, I will find somewhere to hang them all together. Beyond that, I don’t know. I have started experimenting a bit with using glitched video files as reference for another related series, so you should be seeing the first of those soon.

Diving into the next glitch portrait today.

Tried to step up my panel game for this one.